so true.

http://www.asofterworld.com/index.php?id=539


http://www.asofterworld.com/index.php?id=574 

definitions.

Subset
A set A is  a subest of set B, if and on if whatever is a member of A is also a member of B:
Subspace
(of a vector space) a subset of the elements of a vector space thqt is itself a vector space. the element has to contain the zero element of the space.
Kernal
aka - null or solution space
set of all vectors that are mapped into zero. Thus the null space of a matrix A consists of all vectors x such that Ax = 0. The dimensions of a null space is called the nullity.

wow. if only i had looked up these definitions at the start of the semester.
dear penguin dictionary of mathematics.


i love you.

nerd status suffienciently rising.  

.

knowing. understanding. trusting. caring

when did it become, that regardless of everything, you understood me better than myself?
how long has it been that you knew me like this.
it feels like forever.
forever and a day.
and at the same time.
it feels like no time at all.
i question how i ever lived without it
the fact you know what i'm thinking before i do.
what im feeling.
you know the cause and the remedy.
you know how to make me happy.
(or sad when the mood so takes you)
you can read me better than anybody.
but its more than that.

you care.
you want to be there.
you understand. you know how difficult it is.
and still think its worth it.
i never knew it was possible.
for two people to actually want to spend as much time together.
as it is that i want to spend with you.
i struggle to fathom how i will survive the next 2 and a bit weeks.
but i know i will.
and the wait. will have been more than worth it.

xx

planes. trains. and everything awesome :)

europe.
less than a month away.
if only exams weren't so close - interesting conundrum there...

soo. ridiculously excited.
be happy bloggers.
freedom is just around the corner.


route.



travel.

oh wow guys.
this is really happening.
i am going to travel around europe.
with the guy i love.
sleeping in 5 different countries.
paris. nice. in the winter.
oh wow.
i. can. not. wait.
will be the most brilliant experience of my life.
and not to mention...
quite romantic!
haha.
love.

thankyou.

to whom ever posted the comment on my last blog.
i would very much like to know who you are.
but thanks regardless.
what you said was very true.
and i did know it.
i was just sleep deprived and willing to accept the worst.
it happens.
but thankyou.
you words were kind.
and did make me feel loved.
which i suppose is a feeling thats been void for a little while.
not completely.
but its not quite the same when you can't properly communicate :(

have come to the conclusion in the last week - few days - that i want to meet up with india
so that is what i'm going to do.
will be flying to france once exams are over.
the excitement i feel is actually ridiculous.
france.
nice.
amsterdam.
maybe italy
england.
ahhh. it will be amazing!

well - i should sleep.
goodnight blog world.
and thanks for listening
even when i've been angsty and attention grabbing.
but wait - its a blog!
haha
nightynight.
xx

Why?

Do i destroy all relationships that matter to me?
am i exactly like my mother?
am i too passionate for my own good?
do i care so much about people and things that do not matter?
is it that regardless of attributes i wish i didn't have - i still do?
do some people always see the worst, myself especially?
Do things always end up back like this?

music: medicine for the soul.

How can you see into my eyes like open doors?
Leading you down into my core where I've become so numb
Without a soul, my spirit sleeping somewhere cold
Until you find it there and lead it back home 

there is something to be said.
for a way a song.
regardless of its lyrics.
can inspire emotion.
pasion.
feelings.
regardless of what we want to feel or think.
or what logic says.
we can relate to every song ever written.
even if not just because of its lyrics.
but because of raw emotion.
every song has a raw emotion, that on some basic level everybody can relate to.

i applaud evanescence.
they have beautiful songs.
that
- despide the fact i am as happy as larry -
will leave me close to tears.
or with the radio at full ball singing my lungs out.
(usually best when im driving alone. apologies for those who've had to suffer it when i'm not alone)
vague point?
that music, even if it doesnt relate to our situation lyrically, will relate to us.

we will find the two lines that could potentially apply to us.
and feel the whole song is about something completely different then it is.
obviously we have the ability to see that it has a different meaning.
but that is what it will mean to us.
it is due to this.
that we think songs express our emotions.
we listen to them
sing them.
associate them to ourselves.
and in the process - heal.
emotions we wouldn't express, talk about, let alone think about.
slowly pour.
and we are forced to feel.
and as such.
in a manner of speaking.
are expressing our own emotions.

Now that I know what I'm without
You can't just leave me
Breathe into me and make me real
Bring me to life 

oh how i love music.
^_^

Sleepless.

Cannot sleep.
watching o.c.
rolling over causes my bed to squeek.
much more entertaining when you're not alone :(
sleep is so not coming to me.
lonely.
would give anything for a specific hug.
pity its miles away...
or more specifically months away.
first of October.
November is still much. much too far away.
here you go bloggers.
insight into my inner mind.
i always think the most when I'm about to sleep.
or can't sleep.
now i shall try again.
much love my faithful blogians.
xo

lessthan3

I can’t stand to fly
I’m not that naive
I’m just out to find
The better part of me

superman.
five for fighting.

It may sound absurd...but don’t be naive
Even heroes have the right to bleed
I may be disturbed...but won’t you concede
Even heroes have the right to dream
It’s not easy to be me

love.

public transport.

i caught a bus today.
alright - i do this quite often for uni.
but today i did it for leisure reasons.
how i do not miss having to catch public transport all the time.
 i suppose its bizare.
but i don't see how everybody does it.
whilst i actually enjoyed catching the bus today.
because the weather was beautiful.
and i wore shorts and a singlet.
okay - this was probably because i wanted the weather to be good.
better than the never ending winter we've had.
seriously - could it have been any longer?

but back on to my topic.
i don't know how people my age, can stand not having their license.
i drive to work. x 4.
i don't drive to uni - because it would be a death sentence.
but i drive everywhere and anywhere i can.
freedom.
to do as i feel.
i hate how limited it is because i don't have my own car.
but not to have my licence?
would be killer.
well - maybe not. but definitely a lot less convienent.

have work tomorrow.
first proper work shift i've had all holidays.
which in itself is bizare.
seems majority of my jobs end with holidays.
makes sense from cpca point of view.
trying to quit brumbys. so i cant complain about that.

turns out my second job is hiring.
bought a new booth.
party@funkyfotobooths.com
email them if you want a job.
its pretty good.
definitely can't complain.
hope you are all well :)

red wine and cheese.

the bane of my existance. the best things in the world.
the reason i survived a night without my boyfriend.
the reason i love another night with legs and cynic
2 bottles of wine.
brie.
home made burritos for dinner.
apple pie dessert.
toy story 3 uno.
playing pool.
discussing life.
sex. love.
and everything in between.
mmm.
in relation to legs blog (one which i suggest EVERYBODY read)
it was an evening.
a moment.
that i was able to enjoy it within the moment.
and how i love them both for it.

brunch of champions.
salami and cheese toasties.
cookie dough and then cookies.
more toy story 3 uno.
enjoying conversations i have longed for awhile.
and that is why,
some friendships - are overwhelming.

out and about.

So.
It was a fairly hectic weekend.
house warming of one of the coolest people i've met at uni on friday night.
drinks and walking around carlton.
entertaining :)
spending time with cynic and legsit had been a while.
getting home and squishing the 3 of us into one bed.
it was joyous :)
although.
slightly frustrating, because 3rd wheeling, is okay, if you know you have your own partner to hold onto sometime soon.
that was slightly upsetting to realize it was not the case :(
less than 50 days now.
just.
blurrrghhh.

saturday, well, it was the grand final of course.
i was meant to have work.
or so i thought.
got there - realized nobody else was - and discovered its next weekend.
awkward?
i think so.

saving grace?
i spent pretty much the entire afternoon and night skyping with india - in china :P
thank goodness for that.
although.
its much like when i was younger.
i never felt home sick because i never spoke to my loved ones whilst i was away.
i feel like one of the other children now.
 as much as i love talking to him, and seeing him.
it doesn't help that fact that i wont get to actually touch him again, for quite some time.
:(

yesterday. sunday. my cousin got married.
my cousin - closest in age to myself.
she is 20.
i feel so much older now.
have i really reached that stage in my life?
when people start getting married?

you know what i mean.
theres the 18ths, and 21sts, and then marriage?
how did i get to marriages, before 21sts?
gah. i feel so old.

it was a beautiful wedding though.
outside.
beautiful sunny day.
could not have asked for anything greater.
and she deserved every moment of it.
i do wish them all the best.
they are an amazing couple.
trish and rikki (chad).

i realized something else.
in the past 12 months i've been to 3 weddings.
and never been single at any of those times, but yet went alone to all of them.
this was however, in all my history of weddings,
the first time i was at a reception completely alone.
having no one to dance with, when all the couples get up to dance.
it kindof makes me miss him all over again.
just somebody to be there.

*sigh*
being less girly as of...
NOW.
:D

on my way back to gossip girl.
finally seen all of season 3.
onto the two epsiodes of season 4 that are out.
i'm actually upset.
i dont like having to wait for episodes to be aired.
i can only really watch television shows all at once...
sortof like a really long movie.

anyways - this was procrastination (so whats new)
so i best get back to my chemisty. :/


For Rikki and Trish <3



love hate relationship.

you make me all sweaty.
when i leave, i can barely walk.
I constantly hate you, and wish never to see you.
and yet, when i do, i know its for the better.
i feel better.
happier even.

and yet i know next time my alarm goes off i wont want to get out of bed.
but i will. (hopefully)
and the cycle continues.

i am of course talking about the gym.
that lovely place.
which i have not been in much too long.
i think its interesting.
that i feel this way about it.
i know i'm putting myself through a slight element of torture everytime i go.
but i enjoy it so much.
it makes me feel alive, and happy.
that would be the endorphins talking.
but seriously.
why then, when i should know how i will feel afterwards, do i constantly have to force myself to go?
to find the time?
i have plenty of time.
and yet i tell myself i have none...
its ridiculous.
and lazy.
but also curious.
what is it, that makes us act this way?
i would like to blame society.
but i know thats not it, well not completely anyway.

so what is it?
good question.
maybe that biological instinct to protect oneself from harm...
i mean, it DOES hurt, given thats the point.
but still.
wouldn't biology be able to see in the long run (lol pun) its saving my life?
clearly not.
anyway, thats my little confusing, somewhat philisopical question for today.

off to party down with the girls tonight.
well if vet is alive by tonight...
:(

exhaustion.

being vain...

because sometimes taking pictures is fun.

dear showbag novelty gift.

i love you :)

changes.

so i got a new layout.
because i felt like a change.
also a new title.

because in all honesty.
i dont think i was ever "ending silence"
or maybe to begin with.
but i dont NEED to anymore.
probably because i am much happier now.

but anyways.
new title.
new layout.
may change it again soon.
just couldnt bring myself to change it TOO much.
i was quite attached afterall.

xx

p.s i don't think its a coincidence that when my boyfriend has been out of the country i've been much more attached to this... not in the slightest.

because we can...

I bought a purple foam hat.
and wasted money on rollercoasters.
and lollies that i don't like all that much.
and watching a person on fire dive 8metres.

but it was worth it.

want to know why?

sometimes, the value of things is more than we realize.

whilst the 3minutes i spent on rides probably wasn't worth the money i spent...
the 5hours spent with 3 other awesome individuals was.
experiencing the same rush, laughter, embarassment.

who cares if i look silly with a hat on?
who cares if i have less money than i wanted to.
think about it.
why do we have money?
to spend.
and althought it was an overpriced event.
it was worth every cent i spent.

because i had the greatest time.
screaming my lungs out 40 feet in the air.
buying $2.5 hats that get me compliments from a beer wench.
listening to police bands, who honestly exceed expectations.
but mostly.
spending time with 3 fairly amazing individuals.
1 of whom... i often do not give enough credit.
credit for being the amazing individual she is.
for standing beside me, even though she is more than FULLY aware of all my insecurities, insanities and down right ludicrous attributes.
and this is why i love vet
:)

1 down. 53 to go.

what makes a good blog?

so tempting to post about my happenings.

about my emotions. feelings.

sappy girl crap.

but instead, i ask you dearest blogger, what makes a good blog?

there are many blogs i reveer as interesting and insightful.
ones i wished posted more frequently.
or with more writing.
or some that i wished had more pictures.
but the point is: each blog is different.
unique even.
what makes one worth reading more?
whats something i could do to make this blog better?

i suppose its not particularly worth worrying about.
its just a blog.
but still an intriquing question.

im currently sitting in my parents office.
printing lecture notes that i plan to study.
utilizing time that i can no longer spend - well... better :P

got my hair cut and coloured.
but i suppose it has made me realize.
its the little things i miss already.

being able to send a text.
to show off my hair, or just complain about my boredom.
you are always the one i talk to.
and you're not here.

sarah. stop. being. such. a.

girl.

gah.

going to melbourne show tomorrow.
and getting my drink on friday night :)
work on saturday.
wedding on sunday.
busy busy busy
i suppose thats a plus actually.
i need to stay busy, and maybe it will be less obvious.
maybe.

its funny how much something so small can affect us.
honestly, at the start of the year i promised myself i wouldnt let this happen.
new years resolution: don't fall in love

stupid really
but i definitely didnt want to rely on anybody else.
purely because i knew how much it hurt to have to let that go.
and yet here i am.
having let my guard down. thankfully.
because it led to one of the greatest things in my life.
however unintentional it was.

and yet now - although in a very different situation - i feel it all over again.
the small things are gone.
resting my head on his chest.
holding his hand.
tickle fights.
laughter.
tears.
snuggles.
the best snuggles.
random text messages.
sometimes only a few metres away.

i know it will be back this time...
but in the mean time?
i must wait i suppose.
and wait i shall.

xx

happiness.

that moment.

when you realized, if you had the choice.

you would want nothing to change.

to hold your breath within the moment.

and have it stay forever.

<3

because a picture says 1000 words.

my life.

rawr.

getting close now...

so it seems.

that in 2weeks from tomorrow... i will have to survive independently for awhile.
hmm.
sounds kinda crazy.
i do things independently all the time.
by choice.
but i don't WANT to do this.
i just am - because, well, because its what is happening :(

basically India leaves for china for 2 months.
confusing country swap.
i know.

and i feel like such a girl for how i feel about it.
gah.
but basically. all in all.
im nervous.
whilst 2 months is short, and will probably go quickly.
a lot can happen in 2months.
a lot can change in 2months.
i don't know if im just over analysing.
but how can i go from seeing somebody everyday for 2months straight - to not at all for another 2?
bly5rwadscdbgtdscchwedxzcn.

in other news.
i quit one my jobs.
:D
well - it was about time really.
sleep was definitely needed.
i probably haven't actually quit yet.
i sent in an email of resignation last night.
i haven't been home to check for a reply :S
but in theory i only have 3 shifts left at that job.
WOOOO.
(note: it will probably be more)

i also started a tutoring gig.
i should have 3 kids a week now.
so - in actual fact i replaced one job with another.
but this one pays better. and i get less hours.
essentially same amount of money for 1/2 the hours.
and no stress.
and no early mornings.
and i actually have fun.
aaaahhh
yay :)

i. like. money.
im also a work-a-holic.
im also addicted to everything i enjoy...
which is mildly disconcerting.
but only mildly. problematic when it means you don't sleep.

twas 6months on sunday.
which is both no time at all.
and a substantial amount of time rolled into one.
i really will miss you.

by request.

i seem to say this a lot.
long time. no blog.
i should go to sleep.
but i will not.
instead i shall discuss my life and what not.
well - probably not actually.


i've been busy.
worked 33 hours last week...
that was a crazy week.
will be nice a rich though.
ha.
i wish.
i'm pretty good at spending money too.


had a brilliant week whilst my parents were away.
independance.
change.
growth.
maturity.
freedom.
excitement.
love.


yeah yeah.

what else?

i'm enjoying uni.
well - not physics.
but i love chem.
and lin. algebras not too bad either.


what else?
next week is prosh.
i have a trike guys.
get pumped.
i also have 3 work shifts on thursday alone.

thats right. this thursday = the death of me.
but it will be grand. seriously. seriously grand :)

what else?
life is pretty swell.
swell is not as blog interesting is it?
depressing. moody. deep.
blah. blah. blah.

I have awesome friends.
does that make a good blog?
:)

i've spent a lot of time reflecting my life.
thinking about life.
about how quickly time passes.
how we spend most of life wishing and dreaming.
but very rarely achieving.
not in a bad way - its just the truth.
I relate everything back to the sims and i apologise for that.
but for instance:
the game is fun, and exhilirating aiming for your life goal.
but once they reach it?
what then?
they are happy, but its not indefinite...
and they just await death.
depressing. but true.
i guess what im saying is.
its about striving for our goals, and getting the most out of life that matters most.
not actually achieving our goals.
another thing i've been thinking about.
a quote from the amazing charmed.
which i cant remember so i will paraphrase.
but basically death (who is a person) discusses the importance of death.
it is only because of the existence of death, and a deadline, that we are forced to live.
without it, we lose the ability to live.
and so, we must grapple to do as much as possible.
for some, leave our mark, before we cease to exist.

i suppose i've realized recently im a work-a-holic.
but what do i stand to lose because of this?
my friends?
my family?
my relationships?
my time?
my sanity?
i dont want to lose any of this.
whilst i realize its all about the game and not the score, why does it matter so much?
and yet. it does.

there you go.
something philisophical to leave you all to chew down on.

xx

so.

today i realized something kinda cool.

apart from my mother.

there is no drama in my life.

apart from my mother constantly being mad at me.
for being messy.
for being rude.
for not printing.
for being too skinny.
for not being skinny enough.
for working too hard.
for not doing enough work.
for wasting my money.
for not spending it enough.

- make any sense to you?

no me either.

but APART from her.

i dont have any dramas.

nothing.

none.

i suppose it really does come and go.
if you'd asked me about that 7months ago, i do believe i would have said

"my life could write a soap opera"

and some parts of my entire life story, really could. and a damn fascinating one at that.

but right now?

ha. im content.
maybe its because certain people have distanced themselves from me.
i should care.
but then...
im not the rapist.

definitely much, much happier now :)

peace out.
xx

and.

just like that.
i have 3 jobs.
i passed all my uni subjects.
life should be great yeah?
hmm.
maybe not.
work = painful.
you would think, from all my practice, i would be cool with rejection.
but no.
i just can't deal.
rejection and me. we don't deal well.
even if, in the reverse situation i would definitely be rejecting.
im so not good at accepting it.
seriously something wrong with me.
so i could just quit.
i do have two other jobs.
but this one pays much better.
and if i was good at it, it would work out perfectly.
suppose thats slightly problematic though isnt it?

anyways job #3
sorta just landed in my lap.
a job i've thought id love for a very long time.
and now i just sorta have it...
dancer shifts actually.
i didnt even ask for the job, they called me.
pity though, its only one shift a week. when i could definitely do with more.
thats the problem.
if i could have a definite weekend shift there.
i could quit this crappy job and just have the two.
it would work out well.
that way i could get my certificate 3 and still be earning good money.
without sacrificing my soul.
yes thats how it feels atm.

kinda funny coz the first door i knocked at was actually brilliant.
81 year widowed old man.
who i would LOVE to have as a grandfather.
brilliant.
but no.
no one else was as good as him.
my stomach renches at the thought of going back. but i will be.
2morrow.
yay.
note sarcasm.

i don't know what else to discuss really...
except that now i cannot wait until friday.
beach house.
happiness.
THAT is what i need right now.
i think its going to be strange.
returning to the place where all i can relate to is just how devestatingly heartbroken i was.
the saddest i think i've been in my life
(the thought of that is revolting. such. a. girl.)
and now to go back, happy?
its gonna be kinda wierd.
but i think its good.
see how much can change in 7 months.
so much for the better.
so much against what i thought at the time.
and so thankful that it is.

going out tonight.
saying goodbye to one of the most beautiful people i know.
thankfully only short term...
but still. not short enough.
i'm gonna miss bob.
6months of going out without my single friend.
its just not the same :P
just kidding. im going to miss her for SO much more than that :(
but, she will have a great time i am sure, and im sure that will help me survive her absence.
anyways.
still in crap mood from work today.
so i'm going to go procreate to feel better.
on sims, don't know what YOU were thinking :P
xx

i passed chemistry 1.

today is a good day.

new finacial year. that must be it.

=]

a long time coming...

i keep writing blogs.
or beginning to write them.
but then i dont post them.

i dont really know why...
i think its the perfectionist in me.
i want it to be perfect.
but i suppose thats never really going to happen?

so i endevour. no matter what.
i will press "publish post" once i finish typing this.
too bad if its not perfect.
it will be written.

i have been both extremely busy.
and not busy at all recently.
i've been doing lots.
but nothing of serious concession.
but i guess thats what holidays are for :)
i guess the scary part is that i know once uni goes back i'm not going to give anything up...
so my two jobs now *cheers*
and my boyfriend.
and my unhealthy addiction to sims 2.
and dance classes.
and camping trips.
and drinking.
and chillin out.
and watching charmed.
and watching harry potter.
and sitting in the spa.
going out for lunch with friends.
playing guitar hero.
or pool.

farrrr outt - i have enough trouble fitting it all in at the moment.
but i do.
and i KNOW i wont want to stop.
gah. its kinda depressing.
as of friday i'm 1/2 way through my holidays.
boooo!
thats not fair.
but alas. i will make the most of the time i have left.

seeing the boys on friday
dancer and germany
yay!
guitar hero time :)
with nacho's
and talking.
lots and lots of talking that has been sooo long forgotten and missed between those boys and myself.
but not for much longer.
wooo.

i start my new job on saturday.
9.30am.
toorak.
me and surveys.
ooooh yeaaah.
:)

can't explain how nice the holidays have been.
i've actually seen India at some point every day since i've been on holidays...
that will make it 3 weeks straight on friday.
which - it will be, because he's staying here tomorrow night.

i dont want him to leave.
he's going away for 2months.
and i know its lame.
but im really going to miss him.
:(
and we still have 5.5 series of charmed to finish.
how are we meant to do that if he is overseas?!
ahwell.
im a big girl. im sure i will survive.

i am so tired.
i walked home from ivanhoe station today
stayed at india's.
but i walked home, about 40min trip, which was fine.
except for some bizarre reason the top of my foot really hurt... random? iknow.
i walked because i didnt want to wake my mother.
i didnt want to wake her because her aunt died...
i came to the realization that death, is really scary.
im petrified of death. its unhealthy.
its enivitable. and whatever happens we will all go through it.
but i don't know if i can cope with the notion that there is nothing else.
and what if there is nothing else?
okay - so i may or may not have spent my entire walk home thinking about that.
and the fact that i think in blogform.
well - i dont really think thats correct.
its not BLOGform so much as, conversational?
i dont think to myself, i think as if im talking to someone else.
that person changes. and tends to be similar people when im mad or upset.
or if i feel like i need to justify my actions to a particular person.
does that make me strange?
does it make wierd that i feel that i need to defend my own actions?
probably.
but i've done it since before i can remember.
this equally reminds me of something else i do, thats really wierd.
ever since i was little, i've had a tendency to make up stories in my head.
i think its the only child in me...
but im not kidding.
and again, its in the storytelling voice.
things like
"today i went to the airport to meet my long lost twin brother" - which clearly didn't happen.
i imagine conversations, scenarios, dreams aspiriations a different past and future.
its quite wierd. but i suppose its a quirk?
anyyways where did this very long rant start?
oh yeah. im tired.
because i walked.
and then i decided it would be a good idea to do TWO dance classes.
both out of my league.
owww. my pooooor body.
i think my head is possibly going to hit the keyboard at any moment.
very heavy eyelids.
sooo tired.

spent time with perfect today.
no joke.
went to the art gallery.
wow - i have sophisticated friends.
but really.
i had a lovely time.
it had beeen MUCH too long since i had seen her.
we had a lovely lunch.
and a lovely chat about lifes big questions.
i think its the writer in her. or the fact shes so compasionate.
but talks like that with her. are always the best.
such as my aforementioned death fear.
we discussed that for a bit.

i think i might go to sleep.
sorry i dont have any other interesting news.
i suppose i should say, because i didnt publish the post, that the previous post said stuff about yabc. and that all you kiddies were awesome.
and camping trip 1. = amazing.
and that JUMPING PILLOWS are great.
there you go. very very very cliffnoted version.
goodnight readers.
xx

.

i really want a hug.

a specific.

well fitted.

closest thing to perfection hug.

why is friday so far away?

procrastinating.

why not use my blog to procrastinate?
i've used everything else =]

so - conclusion i came to

as much as i love tickle fights (i really do)
the bruising that my body will endure purely from this weekend is phenomenonal.
broken big toe nail.
sliced back of my heel.
oh yeah - and falling (being thrown) off the bed. countless times = extremely exhilirating.
and extremely dangerous.

ahwell
worthwhile.
definitely worthwhile.
also need to learn to sleep more
but talking to insignificant other people, is so much more enjoyable.

came to the realization, once again, that the world is a scary place.
bills - taxes. etc. who wants it? really? who? not me :(
wish i earned/had more money.
the whole world = scary place is doubly so when i realize just how little money i have and if i was thrown out and had to fend for myself. i really don't think i would be able to :(

wish i didnt work where i do.

might be going away this weekend after my final exam
*extreme happiness*
schoolies all over again.
actually thats a lie.
i hated schoolies.
this will be FUN :D
haha.
pumped to the max.

also pumped because weekend after next i am heading camping.
thats 3 days in a car/out bush with india
:) soooo excited guys. so very very excited :D

drowning in maths revision atm.
i both love. and hate. this subject.

finally.
somethings in life are worth fighting for.

Do you know what's worth fighting for?
When it's not worth dying for?
Does it take your breath away
And you feel yourself suffocating?

yes.
yes.
yes.

=]

mmm forgot my love for greenday.
haha. lame? maybe. still.

anyways. back to the books.
xx

rekindled love for breaking benjamin.

Dear Agony
Just let go of me
Suffer slowly
Is this the way it's got to be?
Don't bury me
Faceless enemy
I'm so sorry
Is this the way it's gotta be?
Dear Agony

Suddenly
The lights go out
Let forever
Drag me down
I will fight for one last breath
I will fight until the end

And I will find the enemy within
Because I can feel it crawl beneath my skin.

So I'll find what lies beneath
Your sick twisted smile
As I lay underneath
Your cold jaded eyes
Now you turn the tide on me
'Cause you're so unkind
I will always be here
For the rest of my life

Here we go
Does it hurt
Say goodbye
to this world
I will not
Be undone
Come to life
It gets worse.


As intense as these lyrics are.
its not what they say that i like.
its how they say it.
music is such a beautiful expression.
and i can't help but feel an emotional connection to the way they portray these songs.
maybe its because of my stressed emotional pre-exam state at the moment.
but i think its more than that.
its the way that certain things. and songs. and emotions.
relate to all people.
on some basic form will hit a chord if you let them.
not to mention certain chord progressions affecting us in certain ways.
but THATS getting a bit technical.

I suppose the point i'm trying to make.
is everybody can relate to being hurt.
to feeling hurt.
to suffering and having agony overtake them.
when you think its all over.
you give up.

but, at the end of the day.
its not the end.
something, or someone, will be there.
to pick up the pieces on the otherside.
to be there for you because its what you need.
to want to be there for you.
to be there - whether its what you were ready for or not.
and in the end - you will always be better for it.
unseemingly.
but true.

i don't know.
rant maybe?
relevance atm.
there isn't really any. but true non-the-less.
and i shall end it there.
with my final note
being.
stay happy.
and if your not happy.
strive for it.
its one of the best things in life.
and worth achieving, for every individual.

peace out.
xx

random.

thoughts.



a. i opened my handbag the other day and had a quick giggle at what was inside.

- about 100 bucks worth of used metcards.
all this year.
thanks uni :)

- 3 pepsi max bottle wrappers.
i have enterted the top gear competition WAY too many times
and i really wanna win too.

- a condom.
but not just any condom. nnooooo
the one that got put in my wallet in year 10 when my locker was broken into.
maybe dont use that...

-a test tube
yeah - found it in the pocket of my lab coat.
clearly evidence of just how cool i am.

-a broken necklack. earing and ring.
more evidence of my hoarding nature.
i break things i like and dont throw it away.
noooo
keep the small shards of absolutely nothing in the hope it can be fixed.
clearly - not.

twas funny.
and kinda entertaining.

had random other thoughts and dreams.
which could mean something.
or absolutely nothing.

kinda wished i still had that lipgloss container that i lost.
dancer - thats a reference to you.

haven't posted in ages.
exam time.
so obviously there is no better way to procrastinate.
no musical to keep me busy.
still have the job though.
that works as painful time waster.
*think of the money* *think of the money* *think of the money*
what money?

every wondered that you might think too much?
or complicate things that don't need complicating.
i do this.
a lot.
a ridiculous amount of time actually is spent like this.

i often say its because i'm female.
but i dont think thats actually fair.

i suppose i just do it.
it just happens.
i keep it controlled
mostly.

but somethings just make me angry.
or upset.
and i can't shake it.
and then i feel guilty.
but should i?
im allowed to be hurt.
and upset.
maybe i am being a sensitive female - but so what?

anwaaaays.
just my thoughts.

hilarious conversations have undergone since i last posted
with an array of different people.

covering:

permission.
and friendships.
loyalties.
homosexuality.
sex.
drugs.
babies.
pregnancy.
parties.
exams.
life.

welll. want more detail - ask me :)

much love and kudos bloggians.

roar.

the title says it all really.

happy.
so exhausted.
great weekend.
best night and day.
falling asleep.

thank you.

naptime is never wasted.
best when not alone.

holding hands.
laughing.


smiling.
dancing.
singing.
watching movies.
fighting playfully.

=]

life

I suppose i never really realized just how busy i was.
counted the hours today (specific to this week monday - friday only)

uni contact hours = 21
work hours (paid) = 14
winger rehearsals = 8

total = 43

thats not including any homework i did, or will do.
for example 4 hours on the calc 2. assignment.
or studying for exams.
or doing my two prelabs.
or attempting to be a good student and actually reading the crim. reader

add all that with having a boyfriend and a pretty active social life,
conclusion?
sleep = lacking.

im actually not quite sure how i sleep at all atm.
its intense.
but so very very worth it.

i think, i actually function best when im busy.
weird though, because year 12 broke me.
but something is different.
i can't say what, or why. but it is.
i feel, busy, and stressed, but happy.
i know i'll survive.
better yet - i know its worth it, and that retrospectively i wouldn't want it any other way.

i love being in a musical.
i love uni - even if its somewhat demoralizing at times :P
i love the people i spend majority of my time with, even if at times it feels like its not enough.
i love money and security that comes with having a job.

i wouldnt want to give any of that up.
and so - i sacrifice sleep.

not much longer until winger opens.
14-22nd of may.
buy tickets.

also not much longer til exams.
i finish up on the 11th.
and then 6 weeks of break.
wow.
i suppose we will then see if i really do function best when busy.

what else do i have to say?
i suppose not all that much.
its been less than 12 hours.
but i still miss him.

ah. im such a girl.

enjoy readers.
xx

the blog has died.

it really has.
i think i know why too.
its no fun writing about your life.
when you can just live it.
i suppose, i could still.
but theres too much to go through now.
to much forgotten.
left unsaid.

so i'm going to update maybe when i feel like it.
but not like i used to.
no.
the blog will be revised and fresh.
its not gonna be a minute-minute account of my life.
but a rendition of thoughts.
maybe emotions.
depends on how much i feel like sharing.
for example.
right now.
i'd rather not share.
not with the blogging community.
no.
just with those who matter.
okay - the one - who matters.

peace out.

[insert interesting title here]

via request i have decided to update today.
request from what seems like a long lost friend, dancer
my fault really.
having not seen him since - well i can't really remember.
when did we last see each other? (not including today)
would have been winger rehearsals.
yep. monday.
wow. that was a long time ago.
although - the break has had that effect.
i've kinda hidden in the bliss of a break
well - spent every moment i could with india
does this make me a bad friend?
potentially.

whilst thinking of what i was going to write about, and how i was going to say it, i realized something curious.
i wonder if my parents read this blog.
and if i wrote about - well things they wouldn't/don't want to know about.
would they say anything?
consequencely outing the fact that they did in fact read it.
or secretly restrict me because of it?
interesting thought.
but no way of knowing.
wish there was a way i could know that they could not read it.
:(
so basically - the conclusion.
this entry is going to be modified/censored on the off chance my parents DO read it.
sad, i know.

basically - i cannot believe it has been one week already.
not since i updated :P
but since i was at uni.
i don't want to go back - i've enjoyed the break, and doing nothing.
and everything.
i should probably start from where i left off.
which was... saturday?
so - sunday.
i don't remember what i did during the day. but it was obviously not a lot. :P
i do however remember the rest of the evening.
india drove around and made me dinner.
toasted sandwiches, cheese and baked beans.
best. dinner. ever.
very nostalgic ^_^
drove via fashions house to pick up the camera i left on friday.
whoops.
afterwards headed to high's house for a bonfire.
or should i say major fire on main road? :P
basically we had an illegal bonfire.
12 foot high flames caused somebody across the road to call the fire brigade.
3 tankers later - it seems our small bon fire is a bit more important
we blamed high, who said god must have liked him this time because. a. it didnt rain and b. his spa heater was working.
yeah. well. you jinxed it didn't you?
the firemen couldn't get through to the property.
thought we were sweet because they couldn't find us, and the tankers left.
20mins later 3 fireman had knocked on the front door and requested to see the fire.
"quick. hide the goon, and grab a hose"
well - ended with just a slap on the wrist.
entertaining that we still cooked marshmellows on the fire, whilst the fire brigade was there.
we're just that cool. :-)
spa and pooled it up for a fair bit.
didn't really drink at all.
although i had to try the "most hideous goon of all time"
umm - yep. eww.
i wasn't drunk either.
i think that made it worse.
left partay at about 1.30ish? i think
headed to india's where i stayed the night.
:-)

left his house early monday morning.
his birthday.
but really early.
aprox. 7am
lucky as it turns out, because he didn't actually inform anyone i was staying.
could have been awkward.
instead i felt like i was doing the awkward morning after sneaking out :P
luckily enough nobody noticed/saw me :P
got dropped at home. whilst india had work.
slept for 3hours. (to counter act the 2 i had the night before :S)
woken up for lunch.
family members and such.
yay for that.
india picked me up once work was over.
had some of our lunch.
went to his place - to chill.
watched some true blood.
time passed and what not.
had dinner of home made pizza.
then went to the pub to meet with some people.
from there we went to one of friends house to chill
played halo.
yeah - okay there is a reason i have not played this before
i suck.
did however have my corpse raped :S
how awesome? not.
was picked up and stayed at india's house again.
this time people knew about it though.
slightly less awkward.
woken up for breakfast in bed.
pancakes. yummmmmmm.
seriously, how'd i get so lucky? ^_^
chilled at india's for the day.
listened to music.
played with the dogs.
watched true blood.
was a fun day :-)
doing not much because we were tired.
its always fun :-)
ended up heading to mine for dinner.
and an amazing spa in the CRAZY storm.
i don't know if you all noticed.
but it rained like CRAZY last night.
honestly, it was intense.
but amazing.
we managed to spend more than 3hours in the spa.
the rain helped though, that way it wasn't as hot.
funnily enough india stayed the night.
he blames me for living too far away.
personally i think its him who lives too far.

today's wednesday.
woke up at 1pm.
worked on chemistry and criminology.
wow. i did some work :P
and then went to rehearsals.
my cousins baby was also born today.
William Frances Slattery.
7 pound 8 ounces
and apparently a very sweet disposition :-)
i look forward to meeting him.

was nice finally seeing dancer again.
(no i'm not just saying that because you requested me to write this)
love that kid.
sometimes i fear i don't tell him enough.
or more importantly show it.
how do you make it clear that you respect somebody?
that you would never want to hurt them (even if you do) and that in your life they are important?
i mean this in more than just him. its difficult to do, how do you make it clear just how much somebody means to you?
its never easy.
and to be honest, i dont think its actually possible.
you can give them an indication.
but nobody will ever know, or understand, how much they mean to somebody else.
funny concept huh?
we live our lives not knowing how much we mean to others.
and others not knowing in reverse.
huh
strange. but true.
:)

wrote a new "about me" section on facebook.
wow - my life is rivetting!
so im going to post it here.
im sooo cool.

"who ever knows what to write in these things?
I'm 18.
an individual.
i love to smile.
singing. dancing. laughing. running (crazy? i know)
for some reason i really enjoy science.
maths. chemistry. physics.
don't question it. its not worth it.
I enjoy spending time with the important people in my life.
im a believer in all things happening for a reason.
so, take life as it comes :-)
as one door closes another opens.
ready, and waiting.
i believe happiness is so much easier to claim when you let it.
don't let other people pin you down.
life is always worth living.
more importantly - nothing in life is worth stressing over, or sacrifising ones happiness for.
lifes too short to be sad.
or stressed.
uni, independence, freedom and change have helped me see that.
it was about time ^_^ "

well - i was going to wrap it up there.
but i had a request for a mention.
i feel a bit like the media with all these requests.
but yes. i feel, i need to mention her because i never have before.
which makes me slightly upset.
one of the most stunning people i know, in fact when talking about her with india, i always have to explain "my hot friend [name]" - he does instantly know who im talking about too.
and he's never met her :P
she has that impression on people.
beautiful girl though. both exterior and interior.
basically i have not seen her in much too long.
good friday, was 3 years since we pretty much became awesomely close.
we went on an adventure.
one of the coolest, and most entertaining adventures ever.
there was weaving of polls. and frolicking in grass.
running up the down esculator.
well - i think only i did that :P
but still.
she is one of the funniest, and kindest girls i've ever met.
and i miss her dearly.
and to be able to have had such an amazing time, the first time i really spent time with her, was evident to me, that we had the potential to be awesome friends.
i still have a letter she wrote me - a little less than 3 years ago now - covered in glitter on my wall.
the day she and i had a glitter fight.
and she did that - just because she knew it would cheer me up.
just because, she knew i wasn't happy and she had the ability to change it.
see, one of the sweetest people, in the world.
i think thats enough of a rant now.
oh - and i realize because i haven't mentioned her before she doesn't have a nickname.
but really
hers already exists.
my dearest llama
that is all.
xox

easter.

happy easter everybody :-)

sorry again for not posting.
i feel i say that a lot nowadays.
you know why?
too busy living ^_^

thought that i would post on tuesday.
i was wrong.
so i suppose i will start with tuesday.

woke up and pressed snooze twice on my alarm.
poor choice as it turned out.
was going on a picnic with india
he got to my house 15minutes after i got out of bed.
meaning?
i was most definitely in the shower.
(tu)
luckily the front door was open.
scrambled together my things before heading off.
it was a very enjoyable day.
sunny with a touch of wind.
bright red picnic rug against the pale green grass.
wicker basket.
home cooked food.
strawberries dipped in chocolate for dessert.
wow.
it is quite nice being driven places too.
after 5hours in a park, we headed to coles.
bought some cat food for the fish.
yep.
a LOT of fish requires a LOT of cat food.
seriously 16kg of cat food.
it was slightly intense :-)
chilled back in yarrambat.
ended up staying for dinner.
and seeing the film
bounty hunter.
yeaah - i've seen better films in my life
funny though because high (previously known as ranga, but i feel this is a better nick name :P) couldn't spend his broken 20 dollar note.
went to coles just to buy something with it.
i got a chuppa chup ^_^
i love those things.
got home around midnight.
thats 12 hours out.
was overall a pretty good day :)

that was tuesday.
wednesday.
well. that feels like a long time ago.
i went to uni.
long day as usual for a wednesday.
did my criminology reading for the first time.
wow - i love that subject.
its a bit sad. but i do.
got a call from sister during my physics tute.
didn't answer.
but when i DID talk to her...
turns out she thought i was on drugs at foam
this is majorly entertaining to me.
it was something to do with the pictures.
but no.
i wasn't on drugs.
except alcohol of course.
and life.
life a drug now? :-)
entertaining to say the least.
india came over for dinner.
brought dessert his dad made.
yummmmmmmmmmmmm.
we watched 27 dresses
and 10 things i hate about you.
twice.
he fell asleep on the couch.
safe to say, he stayed over :-)
then it was thursday.

spent the day with lou
played guitar hero.
and actual guitar
had toasties for lunch.
played spit.
gossiped about love and life
girl time is well required sometimes.
it blows my mind how young she is sometimes.
still love her dearly.
and was so glad i got to spend time with her.
sang some delta goodrem in the car too.
lovely :-)

drove from her house to yarrambat.
slightly poetic in a way.
old to new? yeah well - i thought so at least :P
games night.
entertaining night.
snakes and ladders.
and goon :P
wasn't drinking because i drove. obviously.
interesting events occured.
played some cranium.
my team won. obviously.
highlights:
high wearing his snuggie/just being...
india "hey its like a webcam, but we're both here"
me "its not like a webcam at all"
disappearing behind a mattress and underneath a pool table.
people not having a clue where we were.
funnn :-)
bob dropped around as well.
twas nice to see her.
drove her home to my house.
had grand girly talks in my bed.
was sexy-time.
but seriously, love her.

and then we have friday.
wow - this is going to be a long update. haha.
friday was good friday. duh.
family came around.
lunch at my house.
i drove caro to hers.
so she could feed the cats.
shower.
water the garden.
all that jazz.
went back to mine.
wasn't kidding. 30ish family members.
sweeet.
good food though.
didn't really eat enough...
i know this because of later :P
went to fashions just to chill.
well - drink.
bottle of vodka later...
my motor skills were a bit lost.
bob, high, legs, fashion and cynic.
high school people.
that i love spending time with.
was grand to see them all.
dancing. singing. and watch gaga vids.
hilarious times.
drunken text messages to india meant he drove to meet us.
i am such a needy girlfriend. lol.
overall it was a great night.
love them all lots.

yesterday was saturday.
rather chillax'd day.
cynic picked me up.
had maccas for lunch.
we're so healthy :P
then went to his place.
watched 5 episodes of true blood.
epic show.
very sexual.
rather intense.
need to watch the rest now though...
ahwell.
watched space jam
omg - i miss the 90s.
played pool after that.
my sleep deprivation (having only slept 4hours on fashions couch) made it quite difficult.
i did win one game.
oh the wonders of cynic sinking the black first go ^_^
haha.
saw poker for approx. 3 mins.
was nice to at least get a hug.
need to see him more.

well - i suppose thats everything?
hehe.
going out tonight again :)
which is nice.
busy tomorrow also.
i love easter break :)

this leads me to my rant of this blog.
i love uni.
in that - i love not being in high school.
i don't know if you've heard the propaganda.
"high school is the best time of your life"
yeah - well.
those people forgot about uni, or at least the stage between high school and uni and then early uni.
seriously.
freedom.
studying subjects i actually like.
talking to people i actually like.
meeting new people.
spending time with new people and friends, and being happy.
not being judged for being myself.
not being stressed.
still sleep deprived... but its a choice. and it makes me happy :P
in a wierd way.
i think its because i can be sleep deprived now, and know that its my own decision, everybody else is too, and nobody is going to think less of me because i am. well nobody who matters.
and everybody else - meh. need to learn to have fun sometimes ^_^
i love having my licence.
i love being able to do what i want.
when i want.
i love being happy. funny that? :-)
2010 loves me.
and i love it.
and it loves me for loving it.
and i love it for loving me.
*adaptation from chicago*
well - i think thats all i have to say for now.
haha.
i always think of things to discuss here.
but never do.
and by discuss, i obviously mean rant.
ahwell - that is all for now.
enjoy happy readers.
and go eat chocolate.
i think i should take my own advice.
doesn't quite feel like easter, i've eaten approx. 0 chocolate today.
hmmm.
easter bunny got me clothes instead.
hehe yay.
way better.
was exciting because definitely a size i haven't worn in ages. try like... year 8.
went to go shopping today (as absolutely NONE of my clothes fit anymore)
but everywhere was closed.
the negatives of losing weight.
meh thankgod for the invention of belts.
its definitely worth it. haha.
annywaaays
im off friends.
xox

happy.

so i'm at uni.
again. (i do tend to come here a lot, its sort of the way :P)
and have time to kill before more winger rehearsals this afternoon.
don't really have that much to comment on, since i said most of what has happened in my life this past week.
I went to rehearsals yesterday
played one of my favourite games
sitting in a circle of chairs, person in the middle ask somebody "do you like your neighbours?" if the answer is no the two people beside must switch places, if they say yes, they have to give a clause, of people that they don't like, and then anybody who matches this description must stand up and move to a chair now also vacant. All the while the person who was in the middle must find a place to sit.
twas hilarious.
the director of the shows example was,
"yes, but i don't like red heads"
- "theres nobody in the cast with red hair"
- "yes well, there is a reason for this"
definitely entertaining.
its the 80's, there was no such thing as ranga then :P
nawww. poor rangas.
lol.
oh - after deciding to start a blog i have been told the computer lab closes in 15minutes.
how upsetting.
i will probably not finish this now - or even tonight... will be funny when i do post it.
slightly aggrivating that the timestamp is when i started writing, not when i post.
especially when there are days in between.
lol.
sorry - rannting :P

i think i'm coming down with a cold.
probably because of foam.
but i refuse to admit its because of foam, because i loved it so.
:-)

only one more day of uni this week - and then BREAK!
yay.
wish i was going camping. that would be sweet.
i need to get away i think.
not until winger is over though.
i can wait.
just :P

i often feel - this blog seems so depressing, but its not meant to.
my silly/quirky style of writing short sentences - doesn't convey well i feel.
*shrugs*
i suppose it doesnt help its the internet.
everything just seems unfortunately emo.
lol.

had a discussion, awhile ago actually, with maccas about glows.
and how people have certain glow about them.
and if you are sad/lonely/stressed it disappears.
well - being an unfortunately natural smiler... i feel i have this.
i smile/laugh a lot.
like right now for instance.
i look out the window next to me, over the university with a beautiful view, and can't help but smile.
i love this place.
i love not having high school and all its unfortunate stress.
i love the people i spend time with here.
i love what my life is like now.
and it makes me smile.
what was my point?
well - the internet doesnt convey that.
it doesn't show just how happy i am, whilst stating facts.
facts can be happy :-)
especially if you have a mathematical brain like mine.
i suppose - its just how i roll.
obviously its not the same for everybody. lol.

ahhhhhhh
i don't really know why im so gleeful this afternoon.
maybe its the caffeine.
maybe its the fact i finished my assignments.
and my chem ILT.
or maybe, just maybe.
its because this is what life should be like.

happy.
yeah. i think i'll post now
yay for quick entries :P

foamy goodness. + winger

I know its been a long time since i've updated.
again.
i keep thinking throughout the day "i should put that in my blog"
but then i get home.
and forget.
orrrr sleep.
so - my apologies team, i will try harder.
actually, thats a lie, but enjoy what you do get. haha.

so - this week has been rather intense.
spent monday at uni, sleep deprived for no real good reason.
needing to do work, lacking the mental capacity to do so.
i'm sure something else interesting happened.
I feel slightly bad for not remembering...

tuesday i was late for uni.
thought i would be locked out of my prac.
ended up rushing and stuffing up an early step in the prac
result?
i finished with 0.03g's of paracetamol.
expectancy = 1.30grams.
will be surprised if i pass that one...
lol.
spent the afternoon studying.
and doing my assignment.
at least i picked an article.
its a start right?

wednesday.
now we're talking.
uni from 10-6.
epicly long day.
as always.
enjoyable though, mostly.
Had my first exam.
Physics. 20mins.
5%
felt good about it.
so that was nice :-)
spent my lunch break doing my assignment.
and prelab for the prac the next day.

had my first experience of abusing a boyfriend with a licence.
who likes me enough to pick me up after uni ^_^
handy.
no bus trip home.
yay.
:-)

got home and got ready for the most epic night in a long time.
70's costume.
bright colours. head band. glitter. shorts.
had dinner.
pre drinks.
cleaned my room for those sleeping there that night.
got dropped off by my father @ colonial hotel.
realized i forgot my id.
felt a bit like dancer :P
walked the streets to a pub.
india and i shared a jug of beer.

well - he had a jug and i had some :P
went via 7/11
had a large slurpee with bicardi. a lot of bicardi.

walked back to the club - to meet my father who loves me enough to bring me my id =]
now the fun REALLY begins.

foam party.
foam - at - a - club.
words cannot express how amazing this sort of thing is.
imagine your typical club.
now its a mosh.
and slippery.
bubbles. everywhere.
people. flesh. music. lights.
knee deep in foam.
rides on shoulders.
hook ups left right and centre.
people falling, and being carried.
dancing.
grinding.
singing.
jumping.
kissing.
holding.
smiling.
laughing.
tripping.
swearing.
drinking.
having.
a.
fucking.
blast.

seriously guys, amazing.
got asked at the end of the night which school i did ballet at.
I felt pretty cool being asked that.
left the club at around 3am.
went to maccas
dripping.
sloppy wet foot prints through the store.
poor store :P

afterwards vet, india, and commerce stayed at my house.
taxi'd it back.
funsies.
of course this meant i did NOT get enough sleep.
definitely worth it.
but still true.
sleep is for the weak :P

went to uni on 2hours sleep.
physics prac.
thank god my prac partners are good.
although one was also at foam.
we compared stories.
amazing.
spent the afternoon writing my assignment.
due that afternoon.
im so organised :-)
once it was done i went home.

fell asleep on the bus - missed my stop, luckily only by one.
*phew*
went home.
napped for 5mins.
was nice.
went to grease.
congrats CMTC. great show.
thoroughly enjoyed it.

i have looked forward to being the alumni on alumni night since i was in year 10.
brilliant
sober though - slightly dissapointed by this.
if i had been forwarned... i would have had something to drink before getting there.
pity.
still.
show was brilliant.
enjoyable. etc.
good job kiddies.

________________(time lapse)________________________

left to go out last night.
before finishing the blog.
oh my god.
okay.
so it was the cast party for wedding singer.
very intense night.
most intense night ever actually
80's themed.
shoulder pads.
big hair.
lots of makeup.
many with glow in the dark items.
musical tunes.
80's tunes.
dancing and singing.
high pitched especially.
alcohol.
potentially too much alcohol.
:P
going to the park.
guy on heroin.

somebody got naked.
would have prefered not to have seen that penis...
great night though.
giant game of i never
giant game of spin the bottle.
most intense version of those two games i've ever seen.

wow.

i dont think i can adequately express the enviroment of this party.
on a blog.
but woah
mind. fucking. blown.
definitely divulged my entire life story to a complete stranger.
was also fun.
evident i drank too much.

highlight of the night though?
being shown this webpage

http://union.unimelb.edu.au/theatre/review-splendour-in-the-guild

if you love me.
read it.
nearly died.
with happiness and ecstasy.
:-)

yep. should just post this now.
I am sure there is more i could say.
so so much more.
but for now.
enough is. enough.
lol.