anew.

well - obviously the old, every day blog idea, died.
but i decided i would still write some things here.

not so much day - day.

just more, thoughts and what not.

i realize i didn't give you all updates on my life.

some will be more behind than others. but ohwell.

small recap.

got into wedding singer.
got called back for the lead.

didn't get it. however enjoyed the experience muchly.
feel very well loved.
had first rehearsal.

best. cast. ever.
i feel like i've been welcomed into a family.

more than cmtc.

more than yabc.
its fun.
and makes me happy.

very happy :-)

uni is new.

and exciting.

and strange.

lots of new faces. and friends.

and people to catch up with.
don't know how to fit my whole life in.

uni. job. boy. friends. social life. musical. homework. busy.
i will find a way.

i know i will.

just - going to be a stretch.

thought calc 2. would be fun.

mistake.

dying.
think criminolgy is amazing.

feel physics lecturer is still hilarious.

practically a father.

well he IS a father. but like a new one.

have spent a lot of time hiding the truth recently.

finally i'm not.

feel that this helps in life.

parents know the truth.

directors know the truth.
people who need to - do.

its nice.

quite a lot of new things.

its slightly overwhelming.

i don't know how to feel or think.

i should be happy.

and mostly i am.

but yet something says i shouldn't be.

that i can't be.

or that its wrong.

and then i return. to that wierd place.

boo.

teenagers hate change.

me included. especially.

so its so wierd for my whole life.

to be new.

its funny because things are actually better.

and yet because they are different it feels strange.
i wish this was easier than it was.

dear life. you kind of suck.

emotions - you make no sense.
please. be better.

thankyou.
in my head i know, im happier.

that im healthier.

that im being treated better by those that matter.

and that those who dont.

dont have a part in my life anymore.
this should be enough.

is it?

also - need new clothes.

nothing fits properly anymore.

i have 3 pairs of jeans i can remove.

without undoing.

this makes me happy.

but is kinda annoying - considering the requirement of new clothes.

and again.

new things = kinda bad :P

well - im not quoting a song anymore.

haha.

peace out.

xx